I’ve officially reached the first nesting phase of my pregnancy. I’m no longer so nauseous and tired that I’m satisfied lying prostrate on the sofa while my house falls apart around me. Now I feel the need to prop up my once organized house with my exhausted, ever-expanding body.
Honestly, I’ve been waiting for this phase to hit since I first found out I was pregnant.
Just think of all the blog posts I will write with my endless inspiration, all the meals I’ll cook with my newfound love of all things food, and all the shopping I’ll do for the new baby in the evenings since I won’t be so tired.
Given that extremely reasonable, and not at all overly-ambitious or idealistic wish list, I’m sure you can imagine how well I’ve been doing so far. It turns out, while I have a seemingly endless supply of nervous energy buzzing through my body like an electric current making it nearly impossible for me to sit still for more that three minutes at a time, my hormone-addled brain is not exactly putting it to the best or most efficient use.
Yesterday I felt compelled to organize the sippy cup cabinet. I don’t mean that I had a passing fancy for tidying or loads of free time to spare, but I mean an obsessive-compulsive, anal-retentive, nagging need to remove every cup we own and match it with a not-too-chewed-up lid and give it a good sniff to make sure it’s not harboring any ancient juice stank.
This simple task turned into a two-hour ordeal followed by a twenty-minute rant about how no one in my house puts anything away in the correct place. I was then forced to search through every cabinet in the kitchen to locate the missing straws and lids, which brought to my attention the dire state that the Tupperware cabinet was in, and thus necessitated a second angry cleaning session.
By the time I was finished I was sweating, exhausted, and needed a shower, partly because I’d been working so hard and partly because I sat in some sort of mystery sludge on the kitchen floor (which reminds me that I need to mop the kitchen!).
Two hours later the toddler invaded my freshly cleaned cabinets and threw everything onto the floor. Figures. Maybe next time I’ll rearrange the entire kitchen so only the cabinets above toddler-trashing height are in use. Unfortunately, my growing to-do list is filled with highly important nesting tasks which boggle the minds of anyone with normal priorities, and keep me from accomplishing anything that could be remotely construed as productive.
That having been said: never argue with a pregnant lady! Just stand back and enjoy your freshly laundered curtains or steam-ironed tea towels. Trust me.
However, I’m going to take my empathy for all the nesting mamas-to-be out there one step further and offer them a beautiful, shiny, pre-prepared Pregnant Woman’s To-Do List to save them the time they would have spent creating one of their very own. Hopefully it will free up their time and energy for other such important jobs as alphabetizing the wine cabinet and washing the little laundry soap dispenser tub.
*Don’t believe me? Well, I can promise you that every item on this list has either been completed by me in the last week or is currently sitting on my existing to-do list.
You’re welcome ladies.