Have you ever noticed that some days are just harder than others? The children are cranky, the parents are tired, the houses are messy and refusing to clean themselves, and you just can’t seem to get the kids out of the house in a timely manner, or sometimes at all. It’s inevitable. There will always be that one day every week that chews you up and spits you out. That day that makes you want to crawl back into bed and hide until the worst has passed. The most maligned of all the days of the week: Monday.
Monday literally means “moon day”. The moon is often associated with transient and mystical powers. It has the abilty to change men to wolves, bend the seas to it’s will, and even send pregnant women into labor, and send otherwise well-behaved children completely feral. It waxes and wanes as it crosses the sky, night after night, giving people on Earth the impression that it is capricious and fickle. Some nights it shines down on us so brightly that the stars fade. Other nights it refuses to come out at all, throwing the earth into total darkness. So it’s not surprising that the day named for this mischivous orb would reak such havoc on mortal beings such as ourselves.
Unpredictable as they can be, I have identified a few telltale signs of that the dreaded weekday is in full swing. Run. Hide. Call in sick to work. Send the kids to Grandma.
It might be a Monday if…
-You ran outside in your socks, through the snow, at 6:30am this morning because you forgot to put the garbage out the night beefore.
-You fall asleep in your breakfast.
-You haven’t showered since Friday.
-The children are refusing to eat anything except that white fluff that comes out of a dog toy when the dog finally wins the battle, and now they are running around looking like rabid animals foaming at the mouth.
-You haven’t laid eyes on your bra for three days.
-The three year old managed to put the child lock on the microwave and you have NO IDEA how to take it off.
-You have already done four loads of laundry and it’s only 9:30am
-Every lightbulb in the house is out, including the one in the closet where you know there are supposed to be spare lightbulbs…somewhere
-You find dog pee on the floor, throw a towel over it, and figure it can wait until tomorrow.
-The kids are wearing more food than clothes
-The children conspire to hold you prisoner in your own home by napping and pooping in tandem all day long.
-Fruit Loops sound like a perfectly reasonable dinner. It says fruit right on the box!
-Coffee counts as a meal, and you go back for seconds
-You search around for hours for the source of “that smell” only to realize that the baby threw up down your back…yesterday
-You have to go to work.
So, there you have it. Good luck, godspeed, and may the force be with you. We’re all in this together, and Tuesday is just around the corner.